I cannot wait to feel fully comfortable at this. I can't wait to be like Kyle. Today I messed up the first patient at sign-out dramatically. I was embarrassed. I got over i and still participated. Net sum not bad. During the OR, I forgot how to put on the light handles and Steppacher had … Continue reading Some steps forward, some steps back
One of my co-interns said that to me during my first week. And I think that that encapsulated how I felt about those first few days perfectly. I somehow felt like the day would never ever end. I wasn't desperate for it to end. And I didn't feel bored out of my mind. But it … Continue reading The Days are Long, but the Years are Short
I asked her a question and I saw her raise her eyebrowns in quizzical frustration, turn AWAY, and NOT EVEN ANSWER ME. Even the med student saw it. Talk about being shamed. And for what? What is it worth? Is it so hard to be patient or decent? Does it cost you that much? Yes. … Continue reading Is it so hard?
I didn't realize how exhausted I was when I finished Friday afternoon. Of course I was tired. But I slept a good 10 hours that night and woke up and just felt physically morose. More so than I had the day before. Twelve straight days of work takes a toll and I hadn't even realized … Continue reading A Good Weekend
No time for a real thought here - just want to count my blessings. Chas - for covering for meDr. Faris from Anesthesia CC for saying hello to me randomly!My patients for making it easy to like themEmily Fan and Dr. Yoo for making it easier to like me Let's run it back.
Call days are hard. In a thousand different ways. You wait for that code or that tanking patient. And maybe you get one - my first one didn't have one, thank the lord. But it comes death by a thousand, never-ending papercuts. Pages, steps, calls, callbacks, missed, etc. And then you look up and forgot … Continue reading Call Day 1: What in the Sam Hill?
Today, during sign-off, I made a mistake with a patient's past medical history. I was hesitant to say it because I didn't quite remember. But with my tiptoeing and hesitation, my senior who was with me, cut me off, recited from memory the patient's full ED and hospital course and everything that happened. She then … Continue reading ReMemory